With every drop of blood…

In a verse of the Quran, which is the start of the 21st Juz, Allah has said “and surely ZIKR of Allah is most great” although I had been very inspired by its tafseer (explanation) when I had done my Quran course many years ago but I realized its importance today, through a seemingly insignificant but heart moving incident.

A friend of mine with whom I had attended Quran classes about 10 years ago, has been since then, a constant source of support and happiness for me because she is so kind and pleasant natured and is always willing to discuss the lessons found in the beautiful words of Allah and His Messenger (s.a.w). I don’t get to meet her so often so whenever there is a chance I make the most of it. But the strange thing is that I often used to feel a sense of loss after spending time with her… as if I had not spent that time the way I should have. The overwhelming feeling would be that I had not quite succeeded in pleasing Allah.

This time when she called, after a gap of about two months, to fix a time for getting together, I felt so delighted and told her that I would come in a few days time… anyway I went today as happy as always, carrying my latest journal to share with her the exciting gems of knowledge I had collected in all this time… but with a change of intention which I declared clearly in my heart… I am only going to meet her so that Allah might be pleased with me…

With the blessing of Allah we had a great time but the best part was when I took leave and felt a deep tranquillity in my heart as never before. Previously I used to feel “deprived” of the company of a friend but today I felt as if I had “entered” in the company of an even better and more beloved friend…

As I got in the car for the long drive back home (my friend had arranged the transport)… I began to do some zikr of Allah… and I realized that I didn’t even need a tasbeeh to concentrate on my words… because it was one of those times when my heart was really focused and feeling the love of Allah. Just as I thought of this, I happened to see a tasbeeh hanging out of the pocket of the front seat next to me and immediately I took it out and began rolling the beads…

I love tasbeehs and this one was quite extraordinary… with sparkling red glass beads, almost like real rubies. As I marvelled at their beauty and the way the sunlight from the window was being reflected from them in a fiery red glow, I imagined the beads to be like drops of blood moving at a constant speed through the arteries of my whole body and I thought to myself that will I even let one bead move forward without saying upon it the name of Allah? So how ignorant I am that so many millions and billions of drops of blood move forward in the time that I am not focused on Allah’s remembrance and I don’t do zikr with my tongue nor do I remember Allah with my heart. And then I was even more amazed when I realized with absolute clarity what a foolishness it is to remember Allah with my limbs and my tongue during prayers and not remembering him in my heart.

It was at that moment I realized that the most effective zikr of Allah is when I really and truly think of Allah looking at me and at the same time doing something to make Him pleased with me. Whether by saying something for his pleasure or doing any act for his pleasure… and I also realized that this is the only way we can feel true pleasure and satisfaction which we long for.

Surely in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find “Itminaan” i.e. restfulness, peace, comfort, satisfaction, pleasure!… and most certainly the zikr of Allah is MOST GREATJ



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