Is Allah pleased with me?

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu

The news that a lady in Canada, had died while offering Salat, had a profound effect on my heart although I didn’t even know her. The emails which followed in her remembrance were really thought provoking and strengthened my yaqeen (conviction) in the hereafter and made me think a lot on how I was spending (or wasting?) my time in this life. Am I really doing my best?

Most importantly, this incident increased me in my desire of pleasing Allah at all times. I wish so much that I could see His face and so I could keep looking at Him to see if He was being pleased with me or not…..is it ok for Him what I am doing right now or is he angry? But if I could have this wish then what would be my test and why should I be rewarded? The test is to believe without seeing, to keep doing the best and never to be satisfied because the affirmation cannot be had until we meet Him….

I just hope so much that He forgives me for all the wrong I have done to my own self and also for all that I have done to others, whether intentionally or otherwise, whether directly or indirectly….My tears make it impossible for me to write more but my thoughts are full of Nadamat (guilt and shame) and yet knowing Him I also have hope of his Rahmah (mercy) and maghfirat (forgiveness)…May Allah save us all from arrogance and non-serious attitude about Akhirah….Ameen

 

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